secebis luahan hati:I

i feel like talking to someone but i don't know who should i talk to. so, here i am..typing all alone. takpelah, hopefully hati berasa sedikit lega after this. today is hari raya rite? a beautiful day i would say. a day which you usually go to visit your family members, relatives, friends and etc. so did i. just i feel a little bit dizzy today, got a light headache and pp. but still they successfully ruining my mood. there's so many things playing on mind rite now. it makes me sick. i'm trying to clean up all the negative thoughts by pretending like i didn't care at all. unfortunately, i failed to do so. 


looking back at 4 years ago where i was about 19 years old. i was very young and eager to know things around. yet,still live life to the fullest. ada la jugak nangis2 kalau ada prob (tipulah kalau kata xda prob lansung kan?). tapi still i'm a great "stress handler". cepat melupakan apa yang terjadi then back to normal just in few minutes. things got so different now bila mana nak melupakan sesuatu, it takes a very long time for me to forget and back to the right track. i guess i'm not a great stress handler anymore. sekarang, saya selalu cepat down. rimas dengan diri sendiri. i keep on telling myself that i have to be strong for wutever happen in my life. tapi macam sia2. ada lah dua tiga minit bertahan. after that, fikiran negatif tu datang semula. rasa sakit. tapi itulah hakikatnya.


hidup tanpa tekanan bukan hidup namanya kan. hati perlu sekuat konkrit, iman perlu seteguh besi. berkata-kata memang mudah. untuk melaksana, akal mesti betul pada tempatnya. 


saya betul2 perlukan semangat. semangat dari diri sendiri and from people i love the most. i have to find my way back. i terribly need my comfort zone rite now. Oh Allah, please help me, i need strength to carry on, i need Your love to move on... 




all i can do rite now is pray:I








tskk........:,(


















would you mind to lend me ur shoulder to cry on? :I